Today in the rehearsals for my play – my character beat the hell out of Love. Literally. I got to kick furniture, pound walls, push, punch, smash, slap and pummel. Today my character also threw her lover down to the ground, ripped his shirt off and proceeded to do the “backwards cowgirl” (as I was informed by my fight choreographer – I didn’t know it had a name). Today my character did many things I don’t exactly do on a regular basis. It was embarrassing. It was uncomfortable. It was so not my cool calm lady-like self. It was – admittedly – also really really fun. She is provoking me. She is waking me up. There is a shit-kicking backwards cowgirl in me that I have done a Sleeping Beauty on for many years and she’s starting to stir awake despite the poisoned apple, despite the lack of prince, despite the missing magical kiss. And what the hell am I going to do with that? Look. I am swearing in my posts. Already this is not good. This is the problem when you are an artist and you write something that you know and then you forget and then you have to know again. I AM WAKING UP. Good Lord. What is this cowgirl going to do? That is all. That is all I have to say tonight.
